Wednesday, July 14, 2010

i AM that girl

Last night found the boy and I tangled in the sheets, panting and writhing against the muggy summer heat and licking the sweat from each other's bodies, stopping only to rearrange, and sometimes to laugh at the absurdity of it all. Laughing at the absurdity of the two of us being there, together, at our uncanny similarities and our fundamental differences.

I fell back onto the pillows he'd piled up behind me, my face flushed and his glistening. As I caught my breath, he layed down next to me, stroking my hair and wiping beads of sweat from my forehead. He smiled at me and I managed one of those exhausted, mind-melted smiles that only happen after your body has been completely, deliciously ravished.

We babbled incoherently for some time, going over the details of our exorbitantly fantastic sex life. Then he kissed my forehead and brought his eyes down to mine.

"I'm going to say something really sexy," he told me.

"OK. What is it?" I asked.

....

"Are you hungry?"

"I'm fucking STARVING. Thank god!" I replied as I threw my legs around to the edge of the bed.

And then we climbed out of bed and raided my kitchen. n

So yes, I'm that girl. The one who loves sex, especially when it's kinky, and isn't afraid to say it. I'm that girl who likes to kick your ass at video games, and talk smack even when she's losing terribly. I'm that girl who hangs out with the boys.

And I'm that girl who's afraid of scary movies, and loves snuggling, and wants you to notice when she gets made up or buys a new dress.

But I'm not the girl who wants grand proclamations of unending love. I'm that girl who is maybe a little too blunt for her own good, but manages to hang on to her friends anyway. I'm the girl who wants a comfortable relationship, where she can simply be with you, rather than having to conform to someone else's definition of happiness. I am that girl who wants to have a home full of love and positivity and puppy kisses.

And, for maybe the first time, I finally AM that girl.